I am having a complete breakdown. I was hungry, hot and tired. I was trying hard to keep LB entertained so he wouldn't cry. I wanted to try feeding him 4 bottles, instead of his normal 6, and a whole jar of baby food today. Meanwhile, the puppy poops on the floor. I put the baby on the floor, he screams. I grab the puppy and spank him, even though I had told DH I didn't think we should do that, then I put him in his pen. The puppy is crying, the baby is crying, I fight back the urge to cry. I decide to just make the baby another bottle... no use in both of us starving.
Then I start crying. I am starving despite eating two hot dogs and a cup of sweet peas for lunch. It's still 2 hours until dinner. I made two cheese sandwiches, crying hysterically the whole time, thinking I need to be hospitalized because I am crying over something so stupid as a cheese sandwich. I felt like a failure for eating them despite my just saying I shouldn't so I can lose weight. Now I just feel kinda stupid for feeling that way and posting it here... but I figured I should be honest. *sigh*