Blah Thanksgiving

I'm a bit bummed today.  First, I was trying to sleep last night and kept remembering my miscarriage on Nov 25, 2002.  It was a very traumatic event and there is one thing about it that I wish I'd have done differently.  There is nothing I could have done to stop it, and as far as that baby and my life are concerned, it is best she wasn't born.  Miscarriages almost always happen because there is something wrong with the fetus and it would not be able to survive even if it were to continue and be born.  Even knowing that... it still hurts.

Then I wake up this morning from a nightmare.  That is never a good way to start the day.  I did however lose some weight this week.  Not a whole pound, but I still have two days before I have to weigh in.  I have been eating fairly well.  I just need to incorporate some exercise.  I'd probably feel better emotionally if I did too...

Finally, and the thing that prompted me to write this entry, we are not celebrating Thanksgiving today.  It is just DH and I (LB doesn't eat table food yet) so there was no point in cooking a whole lot of food.  We had planned on having filet mignon as our own little tradition until we have a family large enough to cook a feast for... but the roads have been closed for nearly a week now and we haven't gotten to the store.  We are going out for shopping at 0400 tomorrow morning so there is no point in getting out on the roads today just to pick up one thing from a store we'll be visiting tomorrow anyways.  I suggested we go out to see a movie but DH would rather just stay in.  He isn't very fond of movies to begin with and the roads are still kinda icy.  I guess I'm just sorta bummed because, even though it isn't my favorite part of the year, I am just kinda used to spending holidays with my family.  I was hoping to continue that with my new family.

I think I'll bundle up in my winter gear and go for a walk around the neighborhood.  We are moving on post next week and I can't wait!  We'll have sidewalks and won't be on a main road.  Right now it is a bit dangerous to be walking out on the street by our house.  People like to speed around the corner where we live and with the roads so icy they normally skid.  I don't feel safe taking LB out in that.  Next week though we will be able to walk through our entire neighborhood knowing we are safe from cars.  It's not a big neighborhood, but there are two main streets to it that should be at least 1/2 a mile to the end and back.  Hopefully some cool winter air will do me some good.  Time to go get bundled up.